by The West Coast Honeys
Welcome to the West Coast Honeys Bae Watch, where we let you in on the honeys you need to be watching. For our first Bae Watch, we will be covering the new fan favorite, Riverdale.
We can’t talk about Riverdale Bae’s without first paying tribute to the men who “gave them life.” Apparently everyone in Riverdale is an attractive piece of work, but we’re not complaining. These #hotdads allow older viewers to enjoy Riverdale as much as anyone else.
You’ve got John Stamos lookalike Hiram Lodge (Mark Consuelos). Everyone’s knight and shining armor, Sheriff Keller (Martin Cummins). The blonde dreamsicle Hal Cooper (Lochlyn Munro). The bad boy with an even hotter angst than his son, F.P. Jones (Skeet Ulrich). The man who looks like he’d gladly waste his Saturday night to bring you flowers and chocolate; Fred Andrews (Luke Perry). That’s a lot to take in, but plenty to go on.
Whilst, we drool over the men, we can’t not crush on the women. The moms of Riverdale, are #woke, and we can’t get enough of them. Are they witches? Are they murderers? Are they dealing drugs? So many questions, but only one answer, these ladies are bad——–ASS.
You’ve got Molly EFFING RINGWALD as Archie’s loveable mom, Mary Andrews. Hermione Lodge (Marisol Nichols) whom we can’t decide if we love or hate. The redheaded woman, Penelope Blossom (Nathalie Boltt), who we can’t help but feel sorry for. And last, but not least, the blonde bombshell, Alice Cooper (Mädchen Amick). To the babes of Riverdale, we raise our wine glasses and toast to hoping we look half as good as you do in the years to come.
We aren’t going to lie; when we heard Ross Butler wouldn’t be playing Reggie for season 2 of Riverdale due to scheduling issues, we contemplated writing a strongly worded letter of complaint to the producers of Thirteen Reasons Why to get him back. That is until we saw Camila Mendes post a shirtless photo of her new 6 pack co-star, Charles Melton. Not sure if we should be thanking the Riverdale casting gods or sending them the bill from all the ice packs we’ve purchased to cool us down.
Let’s not forget the most underrated character on the show. Brown hair, big blue eyes, and a handsome jawline are just a few reasons we can’t stop drooling over, Kevin Keller. Kevin is played by Casey Cott, who looks just as funny and sophisticatedly sexy as the character he plays on TV. He’s so clean cut we can only imagine what kinky things he might be into, and we wouldn’t mind a night out (or in) with this majestic young man. Trouble seems to follow Kevin around in Riverdale, but we’re willing to along to find out what else goes bump in the night.
Also, if you just jumped onto the Riverdale train and haven’t fully had time to stalk and appreciate the cast members, let us fill you in on one very important detail about the shows redheaded wonder; KJ Apa is from New Zealand. Thats right, Archie has a very real and very sexy New Zealand accent that we just can’t stop Youtubing. We are also in awe of the fact that KJ is really a brunette, but in our opinion, he somehow looks better as a redhead. Who knew another man could make red hair such a seductive quality, other than royal prince charming, Prince Harry.
To make matters worse for our SO’s, KJ enjoys posting very enticing videos of him and his cast mates getting their sweat on at the gym. It might be weird and it might be creepy that this guy is only 20, but we can’t deny that shirtless photos and videos of this young man’s abs are tempting us in more ways than we care to admit.
Then there’s the WCH favorite. Say what you like about ripped Riverdale cast members with classically handsome features; the second we saw our preteen crush Cole Sprouse all grown up and on scene as angsty Jughead Jones, we were shook. We proceeded to embark on a season one binge, devouring scene after scene of this bad boy. We’re pretty sure we dreamt about Jughead for five nights straight after that, and let us tell you: what Jughead does to a girl in her dreams rivals most waking experiences. Excuse us while we take a break from writing this article to take a cold shower.
While we know Cole Sprouse is upset that the writers of Riverdale didn’t make Jughead asexual, we’re grateful the writers veered from the details of the original Archie comics. An asexual Jughead could have tainted the show. In this instance, we’re grateful that sex sells in Hollywood. And if you’re starting up Riverdale soon (season 1 or 2), make sure you’re prepared to explain to your boyfriend why you’re having enticing dreams about a fictional character.
It would be a shame if we didn’t pay tribute to the Honeys of Riverdale. They are beautiful, they are talented, they are funny, and they have stolen our hearts. As much as we want to obsess over the Riverdale boys, we have to admit we have larger lady crushes on these babes.
First, we have Cheryl Blossom. Madelaine Petsch is probably the most gorgeous redhead we have ever seen. She also is giving us some serious lip envy. Not to mention she runs her own Youtube channel that we can’t stop watching because her and her boyfriend are relationship goals.
Next is the fan favorite Veronica Lodge. Camila Mendes is sarcastic, charming, and a total babe. Did we also mention she landed her job on Riverdale with no past credits? If that’s not telling of how incredibly talented she is, we don’t know what is!
We all agree that we’ve never had more of a crush on the girl next door than with Betty Cooper. She’s incredibly sweet, but also has this irresistible spicy side we hope to see more of her in season two. Also, Lili Reinhart seems like that blonde friend you would love to hate, and be incredibly envious of. She has serious makeup skill, wants to adopt a senior dog, and she is a huge advocate for people struggling with depression. She’s also dating Cole Sprouse in real life which makes us tear up from a little bit of resentment, but a whole lot of joy.
The cast of Riverdale are always welcome to the Honey-Hood.